facebook and why i have left

25 Feb

this weekend I decided that it was time to quit facebook.

because of this, i think probably four people will actually read this blog post, because most of my blog hits come from people clicking to the site via my facebook page. either way, i still wanted to let my rationale be known since i have been getting grief about my decision.

for the past five or six years, i’ve given up facebook for lent, only to return to it as soon as i could – eager to post pictures from my month-ish deficit.

i will be the first to admit that I love the concept of social media. I first wrote to my heart’s content on xanga, and then myspace, and then moved on to facebook. i loved the ease with which i could catch up with old friends, message my family members, and post articles and pictures i wanted to share. i also have a love affair with instagram and frequent twitter, especially during global events.

but lately, my perception on these platforms have changed – especially on facebook where i would comb through my friends monthly, to make sure I really knew who I was friends with. my criteria were: I had to have met and hung out with this person in real life and had to be able to envision wanting to see them again. no randos. so that’s why, when my “friends” would post articles or statuses that were blatantly sexist, racist, or ignorant (I hold those who blatantly disrespect our President in special disregard) i would become so upset. here were these people, who i viewed quite positively, making me despise them. i know that none of these posts or statuses were meant as an attack on me, but I would become embarrassed that I had ever considered this person a friend.

this sentiment has probably grown as i have grown more opinionated and entrenched in my beliefs. for example, i have never in my life been more outspoken about my feminist beliefs, and because of this – when i see a mention of a sexist joke on someone’s status, or someone blatantly being sexist  – i just want to release all fury on them. i would always sit there and debate whether or not to engage this person – and just decide that arguing on facebook is always a bad idea, and would end in me losing more faith in humanity.

the three other reasons i have left facebook are less inflammatory:

1) i don’t want to become basic. I feel like on facebook (and probably in real life, but I spend so much time at work and in uniform I’m not really sure) people want to toot their horn, comment, and post pictures of all of the same things to appear part of the internet cool-club. i kind of don’t want to know what is super popular or trendy, because i want to focus on being my own person.

2)  newborn baby pictures. I know this comes off as mean, especially because if i ever have a baby of my own I will be so overjoyed with love that I will want to share 10938198431 photos of my baby too, but i have had enough. my opinion on this shifts when the baby is about two months old and becomes adorable. but in order to protect myself from becoming someone that i cannot stand one day, i am leaving facebook way before i ever have a child, so i will be much less tempted to post photos of my wrinkly-tiny-non-consent-giving baby.

3) (this point ties in with #2) i want my life to be my own life. i don’t want people who i’m not close to anymore snooping through my past and present, even when they haven’t said hi to me in years. i don’t want one of my friends from high school looking at my engagement photos and judging what i have become. i almost kept my facebook because it’s such an easy way to communicate. But you know what else is too? email, text, phone calls, and the postal service.

4) i am trying to simplify my life and enhance the joy in my life. facebook does neither of these things, and I have been much happier without it these past few days.

here’s to my healthier life!


(if anyone truly wants to hear from me, please don’t hesitate to email me at anastasia.cale@gmail.com )


3 Responses to “facebook and why i have left”

  1. Kimberly Cale February 26, 2015 at 5:22 am #

    I just have to say that you will be missed on Facebook! But taking charge of your life and getting rid of things that keep you from living your best life are definitely more important! I love you! <3 <3 <3

  2. Jack February 26, 2015 at 8:40 am #

    We all should/could follow your lead and I respect and admire your judgement. If anything I have posted has offendedor aggravated you, I apologize.

    • Anastasia Kristina February 26, 2015 at 8:50 am #

      Oh jack, never you <3 and really it was no one specific anyway- more of a broad observation!

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